Lost Child Found… guess how this story ends

As soon as I put it out there to the world that my child was lost in the woods of South Dakota with no cell phone coverage, he emerged from the woods with a single text message:

A simple That single word — “hey” — lifted my spirits and fed my soul in ways that nothing else could on Monday. “Hey” he’s ok. “Hey” he made it safely into the woods and back out again. “Hey” he is reachable again. “Hey” he didn’t lose his phone. Continue reading

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The Tale of the Lost Child: A Modern 21st Century Problem

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Have you seen this child? Hopefully you will not be seeing this picture in the dairy case at Safeway any time soon.

I lost my child somewhere in South Dakota.

OK, I didn’t really LOSE him, but no one in Seattle has heard from him in a week. He last posted to his Facebook page last Sunday at 4:30 am in Montana; my last text conversation with him was last Sunday around 9:00 am. Then silence — no “read receipts” on my text messages, no evidence he has been into his Facebook page.

Now this would normally send a parent to the brink of madness and to the doorway of state patrol to report a missing person faster than you can say “put him on a milk carton.” We’re trying to be cool, and here’s why:

He is spending the week camping with 2,500 of his closest friends on disputed land claimed by the Lakotas in South Dakota. Yes, he quit his job, sold his car, and took a bus to Hill City to attend the Rainbow Gathering. Continue reading

Conclusion of Week Three of Empty Nest Syndrome

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Cheers to you, little man. Miss you!

The end of our third week of Empty Nest happens to coincide with my birthday — so happy birthday to me?!

Seriously, I think I can talk about the situation now. It’s not as raw and I have some perspective. So here it is:

My kid is smart. Super whip smart. Certified smart in test after test. I mean, so smart it created problems from second grade through graduation because he didn’t fit in any school district box (and children shouldn’t have to! another post…).

He is also a serious dumbass. I think it’s safe to say he suffers from Teen-Lack-of-Frontal-Lobes Syndrome (if I suffer from a syndrome, so shall he). Continue reading

Life Adjustment #1: Grocery Shopping

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No more stocking the frig with this sugary stuff.

Without going into too much detail of the hows, whys, and whens of suddenly being empty nesters (saw it coming but not that fast), I am comfortable enough to share with all of you, Gentle Readers, that I went grocery shopping Sunday afternoon and had a pickle of a time. The last time I went to the grocery store to shop for just the two of us — no expectations of anyone else coming into the house to partake of any groceries or various sundries — we were 27 and 24. The Husband could eat wheat products (well, it turns out he really couldn’t… we just didn’t know for another 14 years). We ate grown-up food exactly as we liked. We bought household items appropriate for grown-ups. We bought beer. A lot of beer. Continue reading

Thanksgiving 2014: The FIRST real day of the rest of my life

empty nestIt’s time I started writing for this blog, and no better time than tonight. This thing has been live for months now with nary a post… barking at me, hounding me…

I started this as a creative outlet as I transition to my next phase in life: Empty Nest Syndrome Survivor 

I have been joking that I am really looking forward to suffering Empty Nest Syndrome. In fact, I want to be the poster child for Empty Nest Syndrome. But I haven’t really had much to write on this blog yet because the nest is still full for now (when he does finally move out, it will require a blowtorch to clear out the basement and remodel for the pool table and wet bar I have in mind). But tonight… tonight I had my first full taste of what is to come. Continue reading